The Introvert Advantage

My therapist is having me read the book "The Introvert's Advantage" and it could possibly be one of the best books I've ever read. I've always been what you might call an extreme introvert. Everyone is always disappointed in how little I have to say and they ask over and over again- "Why are you so quiet?" The book finally makes me feel like a normal human being because it describes me so perfectly that I know I can't be the only one that feels so overwhelmed in this world.
One thing it talks about is the tendency of the mind to "blank" when forced to speak. This is something that I've always really struggled with. When put on the spot, my mind just completely stops and goes into "lockdown." It's not that I don't want to speak- I literally cannot. My mind becomes so completely empty that I can't even string a sentence together, and it is beyond humiliating sometimes.
I think people get frustrated with me a lot. At MC, I was always the quiet one that seemingly had nothing to say in group. Therapists would command me to "process", but my mind just doesn't work like that and never has. I'm an extreme introvert. I process my thoughts inside my own head and I have a hard time putting them into words, especially verbally. I always did a lot better when told to write my thoughts out first. That way I didn't have to come up with things to talk about on the spot and I could process them in my head beforehand and plan out what I was going to say.
It's a really fascinating book and I am absorbed and constantly thinking about it today. I feel like a normal human being for once and not the awkward freak that I normally feel like. Being shy and being introverted has always given me a very large sense of shame. I look at other, more outgoing, people and think- "Why am I not like that? What's wrong with me?"
Well for once I feel like maybe I'm not the only one like me and maybe there is hope for me in this world after all.
Oh. And I'm not a freak :)